First Written on November 6th, 2020.
Never thought, never had crossed my mind, that I will lose my best friend this year. It was so soon, so sudden.
Still can’t believe it til now. Still shed tears, remembering the memories. Asking why it had to be you. The one and only Lala Djais. The one I proudly called my best friend. Words can’t even describe, lal.
I love you. I really do. Never been the one to say all the loves. But you understand. Always understand. Even when I didn’t say anything.
I love you. I wish I had told you this. I wish I let you know how special you are to me.
Lal, remember all our convo about life? How we always that want to do a lot of things, all our projects, all our dreams, and how we never seems to find the answer?
Turns out, it is enough to be a good person, as you always were. Really.
You inspired all of us to be kind, to be a good person, a good daughter/son, a good sister/brother, a good partner, a good friend, a good nephew/niece, a good grandchild, and a good parent* those 9 days were the greatest Adhan had you as his parent. Adhan will surely have much much love in life, and strong, just like you and Arrie.
You have done your portion in life. Just seeing the overflowing love from people, it amazed me. It makes me feel very blessed to know you, to have you as my best friend.
Thank you for everything. Thank you for who you are.
Thank you for inviting me to be part of your life. To know your family, your childhood friends, your friends from the office, your friends from the Uni. This awkward person felt so blessed to be surrounded by people with good heart, all because of you.
Thank you for becoming part of my life too. My family loved you dearly. Thank you for visiting my dad in the hospital. Thank you for making time to check up on me. Thank you for keeping me in your heart.
Thank you for our sleepover days. Thank you for growing up with me and taught me a lot about love, friendship, I’m sorry for all my mistakes, still you forgave me and continued to be my best friend. Thank you for accepting me for who I am.
Thank you for all the memories. I will cherish them forever.
Thank you for your love and support. Thank you, thank you. It seems like I will never be able to re-pay you back for everything you’ve done. During my time, I can only try to pay it forward as best as I can.
Thank you for encouraging me to apply for the scholarship, to write, to publish my stories, to seize every opportunity. You were there on every of my steps, all the decisions I’ve made, and you will always be.
October 24th & November 2nd. I will also commemorate this day.
The day you were born to become a present for all of us, and the day you’re back to heaven.
Lal, words won’t be enough to describe how I feel. But I want to keep writing and let it all out. Everyone knows how genuine and sincere you are, you want to see people succeed, you motivate people. Now it explained why God wanted you back so soon, you have a very beautiful heart and soul.
It’s been hard, losing my dad 7 months ago, and now you. But I’m really grateful to have the chance to cherish, to love, to share, to mourn, to grief, to heal, to understand a bit more about life and death, to learn. At the very end, it’s only love that matters.
I will, as if you would love, as if you would do, as if you would live.
I still can’t comprehend. Still can’t imagine life without you. I was too dumb to have said that I’m logical, well there’s no logical explanation for this, and now what. To whom will I comfortably talk and whine, and say about the same thing over and over again, and you, never gave up, comfort me, motivate me over and over again. One less friend, and no one can replace you.
I love you so much.
Here’s a story I wrote about Lala.
“Once upon a time, in a big big country where the sun shines bright, but the people live in a bubble, lives a girl named Lala. Lala was wondering why other people seems to have bubble, but she never had the bubble surrounding her. She is always smiling.
She really likes to spend times with other people even though they sometimes live in a bubble, and they can’t seem to hear or see her. That makes Lala sad sometimes. But that doesn’t matter because Lala has so many people around her that she can look for ones that doesn’t have the bubble, from time to time.
Lala is always excited with new things and what other people are doing inside the bubble, so when they come out, Lala asked them, and she always listens, with cares.
“Wow so cool!”
That’s what she always says, along with her big bright shiny eyes.
Lala believed that she has unlimited stock of this thing called “love”, that people don’t understand sometimes. But Lala knows this thing, and she likes to give it away for free!
She doesn’t expecting much from other people because “maybe they don’t understand what this thing is yet, but I’m giving it away anyway” she said in her heart, but when people starts to receive that thing, that suddenly breaks people’s bubble.
People wanted to give it back to her, but Lala doesn’t want it, she has unlimited stock anyway, now people needs to start giving it away to other people too!
he bubble breaks and love seems to spreads all over.
Lala feels so happy to see the people without their bubbles. They start to see each other and the love radiates in the circles that Lala made.
“Wow so cool!”
